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Of Earthquakes and Adoptions

Clearly in the wake of today’s earthquake felt up and down the east coast it’s time to revisit these two posts I did last year:
The Great Germantown, Maryland Earthquakes of ‘10, Think of the Children! (part 1)
and
The Great Germantown, Maryland Earthquakes of ‘10, Think of the Children! (part 2)
They comprise a work of parody (tragically [...]